Just Like That

by Joanna D.

India. The quest for inner quiet and clarity. Leave behind the typical day-in-the-life, cast the usual distractions aside and create space for something simple. Practice, breathe, practice, breathe…

Reflection. The “not always quiet, not always clear” portion of the program. Investigating the possibilities of this and that and all the actions that can either stand in the way or break a trail for each. A swim through the channels of self-study, if you will. Yes… some parts are clear. Abundantly. However, the resistance to action and how to handle that resistance is not.

For starters, it’s uncomfortable going inward and sifting through the hurtful-painful-scary parts. I believe most would agree. Kind of sucks actually – and the resistance is surely strong. I mean, who wants to do that? Seriously. Not what I’d call a good time. Distractions designed to shove those things down are created and reinforced. Reinforced. Then, through some miraculous event, genuine kindness, or other simple act of beauty, comes a sense of lightness. Peace. Joy. It’s wonderful and I want to stay there. And then it’s gone. Fleeting. Hide away again behind a wall, a force of distractions.

It’s work. It’s hard. And the hardness of it adds to the resistance. Which in turn makes it harder, more work. And so it goes. Am I really moving towards revealing my truest self? Will this ultimately enhance a sense of happiness?

Faith. If I show up, if I put in the time, eventually the wall will break and the old habitual distractions wont make sense anymore, not in the least. And once that happens all the pieces will fit. There won’t be any need or desire to hide. The shadows clear out one by one as the resistance melts away. Action takes its place and lightness becomes the norm. Peace. Joy.

Just like that.